After we had re-taught Trudy the first discussion she had a stroke. It seems that she was under so much stress from family issues that she had a few minor strokes. The latest one landed her in the hospital, and after a few attempts we were able to teach her the second discussion while she was there. While in the hospital, Trudy made three commitments with God, one of which was to be baptized.
When she got out of the hospital we taught her the third and fourth discussions at one appointment, and then my companion got transferred. With my new companion, I taught her the fifth and six discussions a few days before her scheduled baptism. After teaching the third and fourth discussions, I wrote the following in my journal: "This
truly is a spectator sport. It is the spirit that converts and it is
awesome to be here to see it happen. How did I get so lucky?"
Trudy wanted my former companion and another elder to come back down for the ceremony and to baptize her. We called the mission office but could not get permission for them to come, so I was elected to do the honors.
About this time the water heater to the font in the stake center died. We went to the chapel two hours before the ceremony and started filling buckets full of hot water in the kitchen and dumping them in the font but we eventually ran out of hot water. We had to finish filling the font with cold water.
Just before the ceremony, of course, we took some pictures outside of the both of us in our whites along with my companion in his suite. After the talk on baptism, Trudy and I walked to the font. On the way I told her to bend her knees because she was going down into the water backwards. “Backwards?!” she said. Ok, maybe that was not the best time to tell her. We had stopped by her place the night before to go over the ceremony but neglected that rather important detail.
When I led Trudy into the water she let out a shriek because it was so cold. Everybody laughed and she said it reminded her of growing up in Canada. We got into position and I said the prayer. I then started taking her back to immerse her in the water; she was most of the way under when her left leg popped up. I started to bring her back up and almost lost her. Trudy was, well, a bit overweight, add the wet clothes from being immersed, and she was very heavy. I think I let go of her, but she was back up enough that it wasn’t much of a problem.
My companion, one of the witnesses, told me that we had to do it again because her leg popped up. Trudy was having some trouble catching her breath because she was very cold. We had to calm her down before we could continue. I went through the prayer again, and then started taking her back down into the water. This time she stayed completely under before I started bringing her back up.
I got her most of the way out of the water when I let go and dropped her. She was heavier than I had the strength to lift -- I think that I have written before about being so skinny growing up that I was sometimes called the Six Million Dollar Weakling. In any case, this time Trudy went reeling back to the stairwell where she hit her head on the railing. We finally got her up on her feet and we both went back to the dressing rooms to change.
I felt so bad that after, I changed into my suite, I just sat in the dressing room with what must have been a thousand yard stare. I sat there for a long time until my companion and our district leader came back to check on me. They assured me that everything would be okay. My companion confirmed Trudy and the service concluded with a hymn and a prayer. I still felt bad. A baptism is supposed to be a beautiful thing, but this one seemed more like a disaster.
Even before the ceremony I had been having mixed feelings about this baptism. I felt less than worthy of the blessing of a baptism as my first companion in Seaside often decided to visit the home of a member family where we would often end up watching television -- a definite no-no. Then, as noted above, when I taught Trudy it was the second time that she was taught the discussions. I was not there to see her conversion. It did not help when she asked for two other missionaries to come down and baptize her. After the ceremony I felt even worse.
I have wondered for many years what we could have done differently at Trudy’s baptism. It would have been really helpful to me if there had been another person in the font to help me pull Trudy back up out of the water. I do not know if that is allowed, however. Perhaps we could have let Trudy kneel down in the font, but I do not know if that is allowed either. I honestly thought I was going to get sued, but it seems that everything really did turn out alright.
Later in the evening we stopped by to see Trudy and give her a priesthood blessing.
A few days after this, I got a letter from my older brother. Apparently the last letter I wrote home had left him irritated. His letter provided the proverbial slap in the face that I needed. I used to think that my challenges were harder and more frequent that every one else’s. My brother wrote that I was unique, but not because of my challenges. This opened my eyes and I started noticing some of the trials those around me were experiencing. I now realized that every one else’s challenges were just as hard and in a lot of cases similar to mine.
I should have been grateful to just to have been involved in the baptism of Trudy. It is the spirit that converts, not us, so what does it matter if her conversion happened before I got there? For whatever reason, it was decided that she should be taught the discussions a second time, and I was here for that.
Then there was my second companion in Seaside, who showed up in time for the last two discussions and the baptism itself. He did not appear to be bothered by the fact that he did not get there sooner. Trudy still needed some help after the baptism with some issues and my companion helped her in a lot of ways, so maybe he earned it a little after the fact.
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